ntang (ntang) wrote,

Why I should be in Hollywood

Ok, I've decided to write and direct a movie.

It'll be a period costume* drama, set in the 30's or 40's or something, probably something related to World War II, I guess. It starts off following a few officers/soldiers from some army - British maybe? I dunno. It doesn't matter, but they'll be the type of guys that women swoon over. They've been in war and they're fleeing the horror, seeing their comrades cut down mercilessly, seeing them blown to bits. They run off, and decide to live in Brazil, in a house next to a topless beach.

Every day they go out on the topless beach, and get drunk, crying in their beers about the horrors they've witnessed. In the background, sexy topless women cavort and play beach volleyball. Then, the unspeakable!!! An evil nazi dwarf madman threatens to blow up the beach.

What to do? They recruit the only available people - several hot women - and storm his fortress, still topless, and capture him. In a dramatic fight scene they beat the crap out of him, and then, forgive him and accept him amongst them as a comrade in arms. He keeps his shirt on.

Meanwhile along the way, they discover the true meaning of friendship, and true love. They suffer heartbreak, but they learn to appreciate life like never before.

Insert a few random sex scenes too - which we can have more of, as they can skip taking their shirts off for, since they're already topless.

Finally, in the end, after everyone's paired off, buff guys and gorgeous women, and ugly dwarf nazi and gorgeous woman, they break into a musical number where they sing about the love of their life and how happy life is, and the film closes with a scene of the nazis getting overrun and the allies winning the war, with an overlay of the hero and heroine standing in each others arms as the sun sets behind them.

It will appeal to all people, all ages, all genders, all sexual orientations... it will sell billions of dollars of tickets worldwide and will make me enough to retire on and live on a tropical island somewhere with gorgeous topless women feeding me grapes or whatever you do when you're a billionaire living on your tropical isle.


I'm a genius, I really am. It's so moving. *sniffle*

* - well, half the costume anyways.
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