March 30th, 2004

lung

Debt-reducing guru

I've seen a lot of articles, tv shows, posts, and whatever else about relieving your crushing debt.  They profile a lot of "regular families" who are saddled with huge amounts of debt, large screen tv's, new cars, and nice houses.  Since I am a self-proclaimed Debt-reducing Guru, I thought I'd give you all some useful tips:

- Stop buying shit you don't need
- Put all of your extra money towards your debt

This doesn't apply to all people in debt, but it's also often good advice nevertheless:

- Stop fucking around and get a job

Finally, for those families unable to follow the above advice:

- Sell your children
- Get a good life insurance policy and kill yourself

Thanks.  Look for my book (more of a pamphlet, really) soon at fine retailers like Amazon and Barnes and Nobles.
  • Current Mood: tired tired
  • Current Music: Stevie Wonder - 06 - Visions
lung

Mr. Softee not so soft [l]

Turf warfare between rampaging ice cream truck vendors:
http://www.nynewsday.com/news/local/manhattan/nyc-ice0330,0,5846569.story?coll=nyc-homepage-headlines

Don’t cross Mr. Softee... or next month, you’ll be the flavor of the month. (I was thinking a joke about swimming with the fishes would be useful, but I couldn’t really think of how to tie in fish and ice cream. I’m at a loss, people.)

(Link/story stolen from gothamist.)